I used to love spring, but now I have mixed emotions. I realized this one Saturday morning in early April. As a primarily non-depressed person, I have learned through reading that for those who suffer from depression, spring can be the most challenging season. They can become more depressed by the increased birth and surge of life. As I was driving to a client’s home one Saturday morning, I experienced that “high” from the warmth, brightness, and spring feeling in the air. But then, almost immediately I started crying, thinking about how Tim must have been suffering.
A few years ago I attended a speech given by Mike Reynolds, whose brother Bill died by suicide on May 5th, a Monday, many years ago. Mike is an inspirational speaker and has written a book, Surviving Bill to help others, specifically sibling survivors of suicide. He explained that, statistically, May is the most common month, Monday is the most common day and, ironically enough for Mike, and Bill, the 5th is the most common day of the month for suicides. Just as April 26th approaches each year, the Japanese cherry tree in front of my house erupts. I can feel that “pull” of darkness at this time, so I think I understand in a small way what those with serious depression are going through.